Food • Style • Design • Life
Done.
If you want to establish authorship (have your photo and a link to your Google+ profile appear next to content you’ve created, in Google search results), I’d recommend adding Google Authorship markup to your site. See more details here. WordPress Bloggers, check out this plugin. If you have Genesis Framework, even better! StudioPress makes it easier.
P.S.
I’m on Google+. Mostly for professional/networking/tooting MM/business purposes.
Add me to your circles!
Image Credit.
Psychology of the personality. I find it absolutely fascinating!
It’s fun learning new (& strange) words that explain why people are the way that they are….why I am the way that I am.
Temperament is said to be biologically determined, and there are four basic groupings*:
Temperament: the combination of mental, physical, and emotional traits of a person; natural predisposition. -dictionary.com
If you’re not sure, why not take this fun quiz to find out?! Then, come back & tell me in the comments. 
* According to Hippocrates & Humorism. Hippocrates was an ancient Greek physician, who believed that the human body consisted of & required the balance of ”4 humors” to remain healthy: phlegm, black bile, yellow bile, and blood. Persons having phlegm as the dominant humor, were considered “Phlegmatic”. Persons having a dominant humor of black bile, were “Melancholy”. Yellow bile, “Choleric”. Blood, “Sanguine”.
Apparently, I have but two drops of blood in entire my body. A plethora of phlegm. And traces of black bile. Ha!
Call the doctor.
There’s so much I want to do, but I get hung up on individual ideas & minute details.
Sound familiar?
Certainly, this describes me. I am an “over-thinker”.
In most instances, it’s fine. My decisions are well thought-out, everything is planned for, and I have zero regrets.
In others, it is a major self-imposed road block.
I can’t accomplish what I want to accomplish, because I’m stuck in my own mind.
It’s like my brain is a rolodex flipping through all the “Hows”, “Whys”, “Why Nots”, “What Ifs”…
It becomes too much.
I feel stuck & nothing gets done.
Then, I feel bad that nothing is getting accomplished.
…& then, my mind has the nerve to rush me with “Hurry ups”.
So…how does one escape their own head, push past over-thinking, & start to get things done?
Perfection is actually attainable.
Well…there are moments like: cooking a tender, juicy well-done steak, coming up with a genius design solution, or styling your hair so well even the elements can’t ruin it, instead they help it appear even better…
Moments that make you feel like it merely could not have been done any better.
It is, in fact, perfect.
Achieving perfect results has always been this driving force behind the things that I do. Sometimes I realize it’s presence, but most times it’s such a quiet energy.
When deciding to retire from my “perfectionist ways”, a little over a year ago, I’d only considered the bad that it’s made me feel. It wasn’t until today that I realized how it has also brought out some of the best in me, throughout my life.
So…is it bad?
Am I suppose to run from it?
Can I?
I know some of the “driest” people. It’s not their skin, or anything else physical. It’s their expression. Their expressions/reactions are usually void of excitement, energy, & sometimes interest.
Example A: A very like-able co-worker announces that they are getting married. Everyone gathers in the office, practically jumping up & down with excitement…asking questions about the ring/special date/dress/arrangements/etc.; but the “dry person” says “Congratulations!”, merely smiles & goes back to work.
Example B: The “dry person” is a friend/family. You invite them over your house for a get-together, & they sit in the corner of your couch, and generally appear aloof.
Example C: You are driving, and the “dry person” is in the passenger seat. A bad car accident happens just in front of you. You are (audibly) freaking out & the person in your passenger seat is silent.
It’s not that they aren’t happy for their co-worker, don’t want to spend time with a friend/family, or aren’t shocked about the accident. They just can’t or don’t convey this outwardly.
Some people are ”natural conveyors” of their emotions; their energy, like a ray of light, can not easily be contained. For others, it takes work to show their true feelings; often times an “energy-draining” amount of work.
Two sides of the same coin; neither better or worth more than the other.
If you are dry, be dry.
Better to just be who you are, than to feign emotions that you don’t naturally feel. Apparently, fake emotions can be detected; and you don’t want to become known as that person with a fake…
laugh…
Ever laugh at someone’s joke, but their joke wasn’t funny to you? Your laugh was more so for them; so they didn’t feel bad for telling a not-so-good joke.
You’re truly too kind.
It’s okay not to laugh. If it’s all for them, what’s the point?
I digress.
Who’s life are you living?
If it’s for other people, continue conjuring up these fake emotions. Hopefully, they will satisfy those around you. Hopefully, those around you appreciate how hard you are trying to please them.
If it’s yours, be you; and if that means you naturally get a kick out of Laffy Taffy jokes, so be it.
Laugh until your eyes well with tears!
Realizing things about yourself can be like a light bulb being turned on. Theres this instantaneous “Oh!” feeling.
My mother tells me how quiet a baby I was, when I cried. If she was in the next room, she could barely hear me…my cries were so faint.
On report card day, my teachers would often tell my mother how good a student I was, how they wished they had more student’s like me, and would write the word “quiet” on the back of my card.
Classmates & co-workers would use the same word to describe me. Quiet.
I always knew I was a person of few (spoken) words, but it wasn’t until recently that these pieces came together in my mind.
Oh!
Growing up, even though I felt completely comfortable being a quiet person, I didn’t always like being called “quiet”. In my mind, it wasn’t cool; so, I’d try to come up with things to say to contribute to conversations…fill awkward silences…and fit in with the seemingly “effortless talkers”.
“How do they do it?”, I wondered. It didn’t seem like it required as much thought, as I was putting into it. What should I say?…What should I say?…No, that was already said…Okay, Got it!…Say it…Now…
Words would then spew from my mouth & I’d feel relieved that I added something, whether it was meaningful or not. Talking for the sake of talking. It was uncomfortable; sometimes painful & a complete waste of my energy!
Now, I find myself much less concerned about such small things.
Why worry about developing something to say, when you naturally have nothing to say? Why further the discomfort of an awkward silence with superfluous words? Why not take comfort in a group of people who are “natural talkers”. They make it look easy because maybe IT IS easy, for them. It may be who they are.
If you’re a quiet person, be quiet. It’s okay. It’s who you are!
It is who I am.
“Just Be Who You Are.”
It sounds like such a “natural” thing. It is said like it’s a “simple” thing to do. But, when you don’t know who you are, it just isn’t natural or simple.
You try to look like this person or act like the next person, and all of a sudden you’re living your life as a pretender.
It really is a lot of work. The daily maintenance of a facade.
Why feel like you need to change yourself at all?
To be liked; accepted by others?
To fit in with everyone else…at school? At work?? Home???
Decide to no longer live your life this way. Because this way, you’re living it for other people.
It’s stress. It’s worry, and it’s completely unnecessary.
Instead of changing who you are and worrying about things you can’t control (i.e., how other people feel about you), consider focusing more on your genuine foundation.
What individual qualities do you own? What makes you unique & special? What are your dreams? What steps must you take to reach them? What gifts do you have to share with the world? What raw natural talent can you hone to help or share with others?
This kind of thinking may better serve your sanity & health & life than trying to be or look like somebody your not (just so others around you will feel comfortable), ever will.
