As far as “self” goes, I feel like I’ve finally fallen into mine. Some connection was made. And, I feel more “at home”, than I’ve ever felt before.
If that makes any sense.
Over the past few years, I’ve grown more (authentically) confident with myself & my abilities. Accepting some things that “just are” about me. Learning, slowly, not to feel bad or guilty about them. No longer seeking outsider approval & permissions to do the things that I want to do in life. Dismissing the inherent compulsion to “explain myself“.
It all feels good! Really good.
I think I’d been waiting on this for a while. For most of my twenties. Definitely all of my teen life! Being über self-conscious, and (simultaneously) overly concerned about external perceptions & judgements. It was exhausting. And quite annoying! If I were to despise anything about “being young”, that’d probably be it.
Honestly, I still have days when I don’t feel my absolute best. But, MAN…it feels amazing to no longer be living that crappy stuff every day!
If this is what a thirty-something-self feels like, than forty must feel serene.
How has your “self” & attitudes changed, as you get older?
I’ll be turning 30 in 4 months. Of course I was worried about having things accomplished by thirty. As a struggling artist, I thought I would have my first show at the MCA Chicago or the Rhona Hoffman by age thirty…then reality bit! Now I’m in graduate school for library science. Being there is teaching me to be patient with myself and that is something I have to do everyday.
That is a very lovely photo of you!
Thanks elleroc!
Happy 31st birthday! I turned 31 this year too. I’m glad you’ve come into your own and feel more comfortable in your skin. Here’s hoping that you will continue to grow and get even more confident.
Thank you Monique!
I love this post today! I turned 31 in July and it truly is a blessing to see the change in yourself and embrace that change. I always felt the need to explain myself whenever I felt no one understood me or my purpose. Now I don’t feel that need anymore and I’m sure it’s part of growing pains…and…living. Some call it wisdom. I’m still loving your blog!!!!
Neeta!!!
Thank you!
I’m glad that you are feel so at home with yourself. That’s such a wonderful feeling.
Thanks Julie!
I love being 31!!! Contrary to most, I just love getting older in general. Happy Birthday!
Me too.
Thanks MJ!